You can be social and go to events but that only helps you meet people, it doesn’t mean you’ll make friends. I’ve recently moved, first year I was completely alone because I thought that eventually someone would come up to me. Most people are like that. They’re passive and expect friendship to pop out of thin air. I put together a basic strategy and now I have 2 friends I hang out with and a few acquaintances. Here it is, hope it helps.

• Most people are just as socially isolated as you. Lots of people are the passive partner who won’t initiate but they still want to make more friends. Covid-19 fucked everything up so this is actually the best time to make new friends if you can approach people.
• Pick someone you’re interested in and introduce yourself. It can be anyone and for any reason. My best friend of 10 years only became my friend because I sat next to him in 1st grade lunch. You don’t need a reason to talk to someone. Talk to people you aren’t interested just to get the feel for conversation, older folks work great as they’re low risk and just happy to have a conversation.
• Talk to this person every time you see them. Basically, pretend you’re already friends with this person. Ask them about their weekend, what their job is, and how they got into whatever it is you’re at. Start with 2-3 minute small talk and gradually make your way to longer conversation.
• Repeat these interactions for about a month.
• If you like them, say you’re going to see a movie or whatever other activity and ask if they’d like to join you. Invite them to something you’re already doing, even if you’d only do it to invite them. It puts less pressure on both you and that person.
• If they say yes, you’ve pretty much made a friend. All you need to do is keep the inertia up by scheduling a recurring event. Best case scenario, they invite you to a bar group and now you can make more friends by proxy.
• If they say no, go to the event anyway and try to talk to someone. If it wasn’t an outright refusal then you can try again. If they don’t take the second invitation, pull back and focus on someone else. Put the ball in their court and see what happens.
• Repeat until you have friends.

A lot of the advice other posters give is great for meeting people. But it implies that you’re already able to turn a meeting into a friend. You’ll probably suck at it for the first 3 months as you flex your conversation muscles, don’t worry about it. It’s a long-term process and it will get easier. Oh and of course modify the advice to suit your situation.

I think we make too much of a deal about making friends as adults. Kids are so much easier in this: “Want to be my friend?”, “Sure!”
I’m guilty about this as well, too shy and awkward to just make friends. But I believe most people would be happy to have a new friend if the other made the first move. We’re all just so socially awkward about these things.

Anyway, if anyone wants a friend, I’ll be your friend :)

I realize this doesn’t really answer the question. Best way is to be open and eager to make friends, I suppose?

• Stop declining when people invite you to stuff.
• Stop being picky about activities/food/music/etc.
• Be vigilant/safe, yet open minded, open to new experiences, spontaneous.
• Plan trips and events, both budget friendly and splurgy, then actually commit to doing them.
• Smile and laugh n shit.
• Compliment people, thank people, be considerate to others even if it’s not always reciprocated.
• When it is reciprocated, gravitate more towards that person, and gravitate slowly away from people who don’t seem to appreciate you.

Join your local Marxist organization.

It is simply impossible.

You have to be ok with believing that you’re not annoying others when talking about yourself and asking about them. And you have to do it in a not-creepy way. I haven’t quite figured it out yet.

Do you have hobbies and interests? If so, hop on Google and search for MeetUps in your areas. When you find one, go to it and do that activity with other people. This is a practically fail proof plan because it sets you up to do something that you like doing with other people that also like that thing… which gives you a built in conversation topic.

While you’re there, talk to everyone for a few minutes. Next time there’s a meet up, go back. Don’t put pressure on any one person but, after you’ve been a few times, you’ll recognize and enjoy the company of other regulars and, voila, friends.