Hope they followed up with a BLAST.

It might be time to euthanize grandma.

Rockstar (2.25), 4pk of Snickers (4.40), Burger King Double Cheeseburger (3.50)… Shit, I went over. I don’t know how I could make any compromises here.

This has the makings of a fucking rad '80s monster movie.

Thank you. This is a beautiful sentiment.

Sometimes it’s weird to look back on middle school, and the teachers who brought our generation up as young kids being told about the future. I’m an adult now, and I feel like an adult now, but in a way it feels like I’m still a part of that group of dumb and naive kids. It doesn’t feel that long ago at all. But the reality is that all of us are now pushing 40, and our time there is now wholly irrelevant, and we’re so far removed from those years that it’s fucking wild. A lot of those teachers are probably dead now.

I don’t know how to articulate what it is I’m meaning to say here. It’s just weird that we were kids so recently. I don’t feel like my life has gone by all that fast, but middle school to 40 somehow did all the same. I feel my age, and I feel as though I’ve lived to my age, but my memories don’t feel distant whatsoever. It feels like that was nine years ago.

Just like I feel like I was still living at home with my dad a few years ago, but I’ve been living in another country away from my parents for 7 years now, and my dad had been dead since last May.

He was such a good dad.

I’ve been trying to work on my internet ego. Leaving reddit a year ago did wonders for me. I still think every notification/reply I get on Lemmy is going to be a confrontation, and I can’t say that it ever is.

I hate to admit I still use Facebook, though. I live in a different country and it’s my lifeline back home to my friends and family, and it’s how I keep my daughter in their lives. But the algorithm knows how to bait me in. There’s so many obnoxious fucking douchebags on that platform. Somewhere out there in deep Facebook space is an Andrew Tate comment section where I dunked extremely hard on his fans. I no longer follow the replies on it, but I still get friend requests all the time from Tate bots, so I know it’s still active. One of these days, one of his followers will come to kill me.

Richard passed beyond the veil Tuesday morning. His brain was made into mince-meat. He poofed into a cloud of smoke and was carried away by a wayward zephyr, destined for the clearing at the end of the path.

Bring back Lake Dredge Appraisal!

I don’t give the slightest shit about speedrunning or bit flips, but I sat through that entire video and found it fascinating.

I have a very vivid memory of working with this girl who had a neck so large that it hung down like a bullfrog’s sack. I had lost some weight myself and we were discussing nutrition and my high water consumption, and I remember she looks at me very seriously and a little exasperated and says, “I’m eating healthier too. I stopped drinking so much pop and switched entirely to juice.”

People really do believe that pure fruit juice is good for your body. I think it’s largely due to the average person’s inability to understand caloric intake and how to decipher a nutrional chart.

Something about this sentence really makes me want to be a pirate. Like a lot.

Large Man Cums on Bus

You boys seein’ anyone?

That’s the dream right there. Just chillin’ for nine years…

Okay, but how would a Tesla 2-in-1 weedwacker/edger perform on your lawn vs. a gas-powered model?

The recurring use of the word bird throughout that series is one of my favorite parts of the show. I love Birdman, the Australian mullet adventurah who shows about at the Air B&B togoonawalkabewt…

“What’s a robin?”

“It’s a little bidder!”

We just use a Santa hat. Looks great as a topper. Gotta tilt it slightly.

Bassin’s Black Bass with Hank Parker for the SNES. The best fishing game ever made.

I googled “eldridge horror” and I’m enjoying all of the posts that meant to say eldritch. Though I suppose if you don’t read Lovecraft or partake in nerdom, eldritch isn’t exactly an everyday word, and I can see how it could be misheard.

Also fucking brilliant if intentional here. That gentleman is absolutely one Lord Eldridge, if I’ve ever seen one.

Native: “Tunga m’matwa?” (what the fuck is that?)

Dandy: “My dear savage, you look upon the esteemed Lord Eldridge of Banglesbury!”

Native: “Noka wat’ay?” (why does he look like that?)

Dandy: “My good savage, I’ve no idea what ever the fuck you’re saying.”