“some teenage idiots do teenage idiot things and die. fin.” roaring applause

A huge number of people like pussy too, but that doesn’t mean I want a button for it

(I’m gay af)

let the dogs out

Correct, this is not the same bridge

I’ve said this elsewhere in the thread, but I have had suicidal ideation… ‘events’ as well, never called though. If you want someone to talk to (anyone else, too! yes, that means you, hi!), reach out and message me. I know this shit all too well and I don’t mind in the slightest, talking to someone who needs - or just wants - to communicate with someone who ‘gets it’.

No pressure, I just want to help others like myself.

:( I’ve been in a similar situation, but I’ve never called; I have friends that I can talk to openly about this stuff, and not freak them out or have them be judgemental. I don’t know you, but I hope you are doing better, and can persevere. Life can be awful, brutal. Being alone in a time of need is… I can’t even think of a word with enough emphasis.

If you want, you can send me a message. Might not be helpful, but maybe it will. Just say hi, if you want. You aren’t alone. :)

Clearly it must have been stolen

(yes, this is indeed sarcasm)

business first responder

"alright, is everyone here? this is an all-hands meeting. Where is Joey? Is he in the bathroom again? He’s missed the last 3 meetings… Anyway. Top of the agenda, there’s apparently a fire, right over there. Fires are kinda hot and so we have been sure to stay a good distance away, as to not raise the temperature of everyone’s complimentary bottled water, handed out at this meeting.

Now it says here that we should tackle this situation as quickly as possible. Has anyone run the numbers by the finance team? We don’t want to spend too much on this. The big-wigs upstairs never think about the big picture, and really I don’t see why one fire is worth pivoting all our available resources. Samantha, yes?"

“Sir, the fire is growing at an alarming rate, shouldn’t we just postpone the meeting and focus on the fire?”

“See, that’s exactly the kind of thinking the execs have. But if we spend all our resources, cuts will be made, and jobs will be lost. Not mine, of course, but others. Did anyone do a PR analysis on us ‘putting out this fire’ versus just running a week-long ‘we are sorry’ ad campaign?”

(lol I just got the thought and ran with it)

hunter2

See parent comment, they are back :o

Apparently yes: https://membership.theonion.com/

I’ve always wanted to have a physical copy and apparently through this weekend they have 1y for $60, so fuck it, signed up. It sounds like they just restarted offering the print version? Message post-signup says start sending them for the Oct issue.

Yugothesenuts got em

For 1y though? Mod defo has microscopic pp

I’ll take your entire stock

(sliders 🤤)

(not an image but)

I would take an already-made burger, then inspect it and rip out elements of it, replace several others, add a bunch of layers of new things. It would take a few months and I would have no idea what I’m doing the whole time, but I would persist. The end result would be a delicious burger that occasionally has a missing item. Still working on why/where/how that happens. People would enjoy it, but most would not know that they can customize their burger, or the extent of the options.

(I used to code as a hobby in VB, C#, and Java over a decade ago, almost two; this burger example is me not knowing a damn bit of Lua, as I fork and modify a game mod to have a lot more features, less confusing variables, and lots of broken commented code as I have ideas but still don’t fully grasp what I’m doing. Weeeee!)

What about “sopping”?

A few months later: “oh, oh no”

thanks i hate it

I’m disabled now, but before I ran my own gig by word of month, and I also was contracted out to do work on behalf of other small businesses (along with other work, unrelated). Most customers actually weren’t as dense as bricks, but I did balk and leave on a few occasions when the customers were braindead.

I remember this one guy, his printer fucking died and instead of trashing it and getting a new one (it was a piece of shit hp that couldn’t have cost more than $60), the dumbass calls us and my boss sends me out. Motherfucker I’m able to fix shit like viruses, file and disk issues, networking, like a level 3 tech but in your house. I don’t carry fucking parts for your shitty 2006 inkjet, and because you didn’t tell me what the fuck is the actual problem and I had to figure it out myself, you get to pay 2h of labor for no benefit. He got all pissed off and we got into a heated argument, but he did pay the fee. Not my fucking fault you didn’t spent one damn second with your own shit and thinking “hmm maybe this bitch is broken”. I thought it was drivers, then it was communication issues, then I swapped the cable and that didn’t help, reinstall again, software would work but throwing errors every time… eye twitching

I had another with her shitbox Acer, was basically dead and needed a ton of work to revive. I spent 20 minutes on it and it was obvious - I told her this and her options (I had to charge an hour labor even if I was there a couple minutes, or hundreds to save this thing). Again, all pissed off, but I’ve seen the ads and the boss makes it very clear, 1h minimum and it’s not gonna be my ass paying the bill. I left with the check, and I assume she bought a new system. That one needed my care 5y earlier.

But sometimes I got great customers. One lady I remember was not knowledgeable but was eager to learn, and I liked chatting while doing the work. We got talking about how to speed up the machine, and I mentioned switching to an ssd (and explaining the details). She was all giddy, and it was an otherwise solid machine in good condition so I was confident she’d see an improvement. She asked me to go pick her up one and I stopped her - if I buy the drive, I have to charge you 100% markup (no bullshit, that was what I was told to do), but if she bought it, well, the customer already had the hardware. She understood what I was saying without directly saying it, and so we browsed what was available at the nearby best buy site. ‘get this one, it’s twice the space you have now, it has a 5y warranty, it’s by a company I use myself. Don’t let them talk you into any extras, I can clone the drive here. Just the drive, and if you need help, call me.’ and with that, she left me alone and wizzed to the BB. Half hour later, I was finishing up and she hands me the drive. Perfect. 45 minutes later, platter drive was wiped, ssd was primary, she was very happy, and I left with a tip. I even got to charge my car while I was working.

This was a decade ago, but yeah. Small businesses are cool like that, mostly. That boss would bitch me out for not trying to sell AV or whatever, but he had my back when customers were a bitch too. It was alright. Thought I should have been earning 2.5x what I did for that job, but I was young and nieve. It is what it is.

The few clients I stayed in contact with have been good, and they like my services, so for them I’ll still help them out. But the general population, nah. Let someone else handle those customers.

Me: “good luck, dumbfuck!” click

I have a… unique approach to customer reception and service. Almost all the time, the customer is wrong. Not my fault the dumbfucks are dumbfucks…