• Allonzee@lemmy.world
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    2 months ago

    The Jesus Christ of the New Testament was a dark skinned communist who belabored loving and helping immigrants to his followers, whipped the greedy, and informed them they would go to hell if they didn’t stop being selfish fucks.

    If the Jesus of the new Testament both existed and returned, the “Christian” right would be first in line to kill him again so they could get back to worshipping this guy:

    • sp3tr4l@lemmy.zip
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      2 months ago

      The Jesus of the Bible also believed the Kingdom of God would be a literal Kingdom that would arise within the lifetimes of his followers.

      That is what happens when you actually read the Bible literally, instead of metaphorically.

      Also, I forget which Gospel it is, but one of them features a zombie apocalypse of the dead rising out of their graves when Jesus dies on the cross.

      Also, more to your original theme: Jesus was fucking homeless for his adult ministry.

      He and his followers just stayed at random people’s places who were sympathetic to his movement.

      He did not have a steady job, he was not a productive member of society and he certainly did not have a nuclear family.

      If Jesus was here today, he’d be shunned, starved, imprisoned, likely become a drug addict and die on the streets, and this would be by design and with approval of many of his most outspoken followers today

      • Cracks_InTheWalls@sh.itjust.works
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        2 months ago

        I’m more than a little convinced that if Jesus walks the earth today, he is really into EDM and you’re only really coming across him on the festival circuit.