I agree with her that dude is gendered (and generally disrespectful to say to non-friends anyway).

But it’s clear we disagree on the examples’ connotaton. I can’t really make it more clear that I think there’s a negative connotation to the example used, I can’t however force you to accept that. At the risk of looping the comments perpetually I will wish you the best with this one and leave it at that.

To be clear, I don’t think she had any malice in mind when using that argument, just that I wished a different example would be used than scaring the (assumed) straight guy with “do you fuck a dude?”, as if he was gay and said yes, that would’ve been a fine answer, but not really have an impact (gays can still be transphobic/against pronouns, those idiots exist sadly).