What words, phrases or signs do you use and how do you get your partner’s attention?
Shaka, when the walls fell
Mirab, with sails unfurled.
Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra
Darmok! And Jalad! At TANAGRA!!!
Sokath. His Eyes Uncovered!
Temba, his arms wide.
The Star Trek community on Lemmy is what got me to start watching Star Trek. I’m starting on TNG and literally just finished this episode last night. Very happy that I understood this reference.
DS9 is the best. Wait til you’re finished TNG, or actually, I don’t remember if they ran concurrently now that I think of it. But anyway, you’re in for a treat!
Riker, his face bearded.
If we are together one of us will use the phrase “Is there Lemon in this?” And hold up our drink which is code for get me out if this conversation/situation.
If we aren’t in the same room. We pull out our phone and text Save Me. Then the other person comes and finds you to say that So and So needs them immediately. Yadda, yadda.
“Paying bills” == having sex
For us, it’s “Paying bills” == “Paying bills”…
So once a month?
Uh, different bills have different due dates, yeah that’s it
Logic checks out.
I have mine on “autopay”.
“Do we have any pineapple at home?” is our safe word for social situations when one of us needs a reason to leave a situation or change the conversation because they’re uncomfortable. I detest pineapple.
Sign Language works pretty well.
We picked it up when my daughter was younger and we just kept going. Now we use it to speak to each other from across the room during loud events.
It also lets you read other sign language folks! I ease-dropped on some signing folks during lunch one day. Made me feel like a spy.
Just fyi, it’s eavesdrop.
My spouse and I lived in a bunch of countries over the years. We speak Quebec French, English, and Spanish, as well as a smattering of Chinese, Bulgarian, Korean, and a few odds and ends here and there.
We basically speak whatever we think people around us won’t understand. Very colloquial Quebec French in non-French-speaking countries, Chinese around white people, Bulgarian around non-white people, or even a cryptic mix of everything when we’re not completely sure.
We figure anyone who understands is probably someone we want to know… Hasn’t happened very often, but it does happen. So far we weren’t saying anything overly embarrassing when we got caught, but we sure as hell have no filter between us because of this!
I’ve taught my husband to speak a bit of Japanese, but we don’t use it this way because that’s extremely rude.
I wouldn’t say we speak in people’s faces, but we make comments to each other about random stuff. I would never say something rude about somebody in their faces, but my spouse might go, “Can we go back to the hotel, I really need to take a shit” or something silly and unfiltered like that.
I get it, I just still think it’s rude and avoid doing so myself.
It’s rude for spouses to have a private conversation? Would whispering be better? Would it be better if they hid in a cupboard where no one could see them?
Yes, it's generally considered rude to switch languages specifically to hide your conversation.
It's because most will assume you are doing it to talk shit.
Sure, if people suddenly switched languages and then laughed in my face, I would feel bad.
But if it’s like the other comments in this post, and it’s a couple having a quick word about a private matter, I wouldn’t mind. It’s not like I should be a part of that conversation
Which they are.
Agree, it’s rude af.
Tell me you’re insecure without saying you’re insecure.
It is rude to intentionally speak in a language that the people around you don’t understand (especially if you’re doing so specifically because they don’t understand it), yes.
That’s probably a cultural thing, isn’t it? In diverse areas, people don’t expect to understand what they hear others say, so there’s no “Speak ___; we’re in ___” culture.
I’d say it’s more of a context thing. If you’re hanging out in a group of people chatting together and you code switch to speak to someone so nobody else can understand, that’s rude. If you’re just speaking to someone in another language on your own, nobody cares (except xenophobic bigots).
Oh, that makes sense. I didn't consider anyone would do that.
Definitely an American thing. Wide swaths of the country have issues with any kind of diversity.
I love those videos where people are caught trying to have a private conversation by someone who speaks an unexpected language! Also it’s shocking to me how many people loudly speak common dialects of Chinese and don’t expect anyone to follow… literally over a billion humans can understand Mandarin, someone is listening.
Haha, I’ve caught plenty of Chinese speakers having what they presume are private conversations in my presence, and sometimes even about me. People just automatically assume non-Asians can’t speak Chinese, even when these non-Asians live in China.
This happens to me sometimes as I lived in enough places that I understand a lot of common stuff in various European languages even though I don’t speak them beyond ordering a beer or whatever.
Dinosaur noises, typically when we’re trying to find each other.
My dad would meow loudly when him and my mom got separated while shopping. Mom would rush over as fast as possible to shut him up.
My wife knows that if I say “Honey, I need to do that thing with my butt” she knows I have to poop, with everyone else listening blissfully unaware.
That’s pretty slick, might have to steal it
Ok but don’t use it in Canada I can’t risk people learning what it means around here
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"my significant other did not address me as Mr. Bananapoopblender, something is seriously wrong!"
Movie quotes. It’s amazing how many questioning looks we get from other people when quoting movies to each other.
Pig Latin. Kids haven’t figured it out yet. One can spell so that went out the window.
Next stop is probably Morse code.
.-…-. … . -. -… -. …- -… . … .-…-.
Ooh! Morse code with tongue clicks!
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Ha! Our trick is that we’re never with company. We are very boring homebodies.
This is the way.
If I tell my partner that something drains the color out of a room, she knows that whomever I’m talking to is a bigot/phobe and we leave. More often than not though, she’ll ask me who it is and tell them off.
This is amazing, I love it.
Well, sometimes she is a bit overprotective, once she punched someone who wasn’t respecting my pronouns LOL.
Married 30 years. Eyebrow position and, “eh?”
“Eh.”
And we are pretty much on the same page.
Yup, we’re only at 12, but a look is enough, we’re usually thinking the same thing.
But the other additional one, three squeezes, hands, or whatever can be touched without being obvious, is I love you. Seems sweet, but most often used when one of us is getting pissed off (at something/someone else, not each other).
We do the same three taps on the shoulder or hand squeezes for “I love you” too. Hon, is that you?
Not 30 years, but usually just looking at each other says enough, with maybe a head motion if it's time to go. Facial expressions say a lot on their own, and if you know someone well enough, even subtle differences can say a lot.
Nice try.
