“You’ll feel better in the morning.”
I get a lot of intrusive, negative, catastrophising thoughts late at night. Worrying about things I would never worry about during daylight.
I always try to tell myself: don’t think about this stuff right now, it’s not helpful. Put it aside and if it still feels important in the morning then you can do something about it. Fixating on it right now serves no useful purpose.
It can be hard. Honestly I got pretty lucky in that I was able to find lots of good people through work. There are good and bad parts to the industry I work in, I got hired by a company with a really strong culture that matched what I was looking for. So I was surrounded by a ton of people with similar values and overlapping interests.
Without that, I think mostly it’s about trial and error. If you’re struggling to find the right people, you need to be brave enough to keep putting yourself out there, and to walk away from groups that just aren’t a good match. Like I said, not easy!
Lol yep I’m 34 and also just recently diagnosed with inattentive ADHD. Hence being very aware of different communication styles.
Bit of a left field suggestion but one thing that really helps is finding your people.
In my younger years I sometimes really struggled with casual conversation, I often felt like I was the weird guy who had nothing to say.
It turned out that was only really true when I was spending a lot of time with people with whom I had very little in common. As I got older I eventually found “my people”. Friends who I click with, who I share values and interests with, who communicate similarly to me.
It’s not about finding people who are just copies of you, that would be pretty boring and make for a real social echo chamber. You want a range of friends with different interests, from different walks of life. But you want them to be, for lack of a better term “compatible” with you.
If you happen to be neurodivergent then that adds a whooooole extra layer of complexity to conversational compatibility. There’s a stereotype that autistic people are awkward or socially inept, which is complete rubbish. They just communicate differently to neurotypicals. Put a bunch of similar autistic people in a room together and watch them have no trouble at all making conversation with each other, in their own style.
Anyway, maybe this isn’t relevant to you, and you’re already happy with the people in your life. But it’s worth taking the time to examine whether the reason you struggle to make conversation is because you’re trying to make it with the wrong people.
Man this has been on my game list for so long! I really need to play it! But I have to finish BG3 first!
You’re welcome! Good luck!
Haha it can definitely be challenging at the higher difficulty levels but I probably made it sound a bit more hectic than it is.
It’s pausable at all times so you can always work at whatever pace you want.
The pacing balance that I mentioned is more around having to make the right decisions. I.e. choosing when is the right moment to explore deeper into the forest for more resources. Choosing when to take on more citizens. That sort of thing.
Against the Storm! It’s a city builder / roguelike mashup.
I.e., you start a new city, build it up, try to meet objectives and citizen demands before the inevitable, overwhelming storm eventually comes and wipes everything out. Then you do it all again, but better, using whatever new cool stuff you unlocked from the last cycle.
The faster you work, the more dangerous the environment becomes. But build too slowly and you won’t get enough done before the storm arrives. So you have to balance growth vs caution when building.
Each run you have different resources and buildings available so your city always evolves differently and it doesn’t get stale. The vibes are impeccable as well, it’s moody and ominous yet somehow cozy at the same time.
Highly recommend it. This is a pretty decent run down: https://youtu.be/8SVw2ZJ73N0?si=4dcZEvyTjW_7qCbR
It’s a different word. To have a whinge. Whinging. The G is pronounced like a J.
Google says it’s more common in British English. I’m Aussie and we use it too. Mostly to hang shit on the English lol. I.e. whinging poms.
I think they’re just trying to say how iconic they are as a brand because they’ve featured in so many bits of pop culture. It’s just a “we’re so cool, buy our stuff” campaign.
Magneto. If someone is trying to genocide you, you don’t just ask nicely and hope that they change their mind. You fight them.
Hung over shower (cleansing)
Definitely, I don’t really like Ubuntu that much even though it’s my go-to. What I like is Xfce. Whether I get it via xubuntu or something else I don’t really care.