The ADHD urge to lie about why you didn’t do something because “my brain refused to start on it” doesn’t make sense to a lot of neurotypicals.
This behavior has gotten me into a lot of shit over the years😬🤦♂️
#ADHD #neurodivergent #neurodiversity #neurodiverse #neurodivergence #ADHDmemes
Jokes aside, I’d love to figure out how to help my kid with this. Sometimes shit just isn’t in the cards and it causes a lot of pain between us.
@Gradually_Adjusting @adhd well I hope nobody perceives it as a joke…I’m dead serious. I’ve lied SO much when I was younger about why I didn’t finish something. But I live in the US Deep South and nobody believes in mental issues here.🤦♂️
Nah dude from the parent’s perspective this shit ain’t always that funny lmao… I enjoy the humour but I also take it seriously. I’m grateful that so many people with ADHD make memes and shitposts about their experiences because it helps me to empathise with my kid.
@Gradually_Adjusting @adhd yeah I didn’t mean it as a joke or meme. I tagged adhdmeme so others might see it🤷♂️
I’m with you. My kid has adhd and I read these comics, not for the humor, but to get an idea of what’s going on in his head.
Thank you for doing that. Thank you for making an effort to understand him. Like a parent should! Thank you so much! I genuinely mean it. 💖
You’re welcome, but I’m no angel! His ADHD frustrates the absolute hell out of me. Trying to play with him results in a shift in activity every 5 minutes. It’s painful when I get invested in drawing Godzilla pictures only to have to go play pretend Minecraft 5 minutes in.
Reading these is a survival mechanism for me!
On a side note: I’ve realized I share sooooooo many symptoms with him. Currently in progress getting tested for adult ADHD.
I should get tested as well, even as an adult.
As a kid it was really bad, and affected my entire schooling negatively (I was the kid who would ace every test and quiz but still end up with a C because I turned in zero homework assignments…gifted classes but struggling to make the honor roll)…but my parents were worried about both the stigma of a diagnosis as well as the fear that I’d get prescribed something that would turn me into a zombie. Probably both unfounded fears but that’s why they never got me tested and growing up, only having them for perspective, that’s what I thought as well.
Basically they tried to make me afraid of getting a diagnosis in order to get me to “straighten up” and do my homework.
Looking back, I really wish they’d have looked into it and at least got me evaluated. If there was something I could take that would’ve improved my focus, it probably would have been a huge help in my academics.
It depends on what specifically you’re trying to get him to do, but something I’ve found very helpful is setting up the environment in a way that will lower the “initiation energy” of something to make it easier to start doing. YMMV on what does or doesn’t work for him, my spouse and I have found labels and organizing by task to be a huge help in making it easier to start things because now I have to devote 0% of my brain power to wandering around finding everything I need and staying on task, and I don’t need to root through drawers to find it.
Sensory adjustments to the environment might also be useful, like changing light levels, noise blocking headphones/ear plugs, or playing white noise/natural noises. And it sounds hippy dippy as fuck, but time in outdoor green spaces has been shown to improve symptoms in kids with ADHD, so if you guys aren’t regularly spending time outside or at the park it could be a good to incorporate it.
You’re already doing a lot more than many parents just by trying to understand and empathize instead of beating it out of him, so fist bump from a former neurodivergent kid. 🤜
What’s helped me is a combination of physical exercise (which helps against feelings of unrest that may be bothering me) and sort of sliding into the subject, tackling the easier parts first and from there riding the dopamine wave.
But yeah, it doesn’t get any easier.
I kinda… Need it to?
That’s where therapy for you comes in. Gotta figure out how to get used to it, because adhd is for life.
It might help you to think of your son having adhd as being functionally the same if he was paraplegic.
ADHD isn’t a chemical imbalance like depression. It’s a developmental disorder where something happened to his brain while he was a fetus, and now his frontal/prefrontal cortex doesn’t function correctly.
It’s literally a disability, so you don’t cure it, you learn to work around it.
After a half a decade or so, I do feel as if I could use some counseling. So many quick and intense feelings that I’ve never had to deal with before have left me feeling somewhat whiplashed - reactive and grouchy… I’ll try to make room in my life for some talk therapy down the road. Meanwhile we’re seeking options to help him manage his symptoms. Thanks
If your son having adhd is a struggle for you, then therapy needs to be now, not later. Otherwise there’s a chance you might start resenting him, and those feelings can be hard to get rid of after they get established.
Or, at least read some self help books specifically for parents of adhd children.
My wife figured out she was on the spectrum not too long ago, and me getting therapy and reading books for people in my situation really helped with being patient and understanding.
But, I made the mistake of waiting until things became an actual problem before doing it, so it’s been a struggle for me to not struggle with it.
Depending on how old your kid is, it might or it might not improve. The frontal lobe of their brain still has a lot of development left in children; right up until they’re about 25. This may improve things.
Also, please don’t be one of those parents who discounts meds. They can really help a lot. And no, they’re not addictive (in fact, people with ADHD are more likely to forget them than to use them recreationally).
Thank you. Sincerely. My parents are the ones who have been working on me, trying to play it off as no big deal and trying to scare me away from pharmaceuticals. “Everyone I knew who ever abused pills was medicated as a child,” and other shit like that.
Currently he’s very young, and I have heard that the presentation changes with age. I have some hope. An older friend with ADHD tells me that his memories of being this age were like that of “being a feral animal”, and he marvels at what mine is capable of already. That’s the frustration of it for me, he’s so bright and I only get to see it a few moments at a time. I want to bask in his glow my whole life.