Edit: while I’m at it, does anyone know what I should do when I’m waiting for a coincidence/adventure to happen, but it never comes? I can’t really go outside and arrange for it to happen because I don’t know what I’m looking for.
Slow is smooth, smooth is fast.
Practice the basics, get it right. Don’t try to go faster for the sake of going faster, you’ll hit your limit and get sloppy and pickup bad habits. Test your limits to learn them, but don’t hit them every time. Get comfortable within them and the goal posts will move.
I don’t know who originally said it, but “Everything in moderation, including moderation.” That is, it’s okay to go overboard on something as long as that’s an exception, not a norm. Want to eat a whole carton of ice cream? It’s not going to kill you if you do it, as long as you don’t do it every weekend. Enjoy stuff, don’t be excessive generally, but the rare occasion is just fine.
Note: there are, of course, exceptions. You probably don’t want to try even a little black tar heroin unless you’re okay with the risk of becoming an addict.
“I’ll take a weird person over a mean person any day.”
“Never half-ass two things. Whole-ass one thing.”
-Ron Swanson
“Everything you want in life has teeth”.
It means no matter what you think you want that’ll surely make you perfectly happy, it’ll never quite be what you want.
“you can’t always get what you want, but if you try sometimes, you find you get what you need”. - the great philosopher Jagger
I may not always get exactly what I want, but if I put in the effort and do my best, I find that sometimes what I want is not what I needed in the end.
“The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. The second best time is right now.”
Stop regretting what you didn’t do in the past, and do it now. Time will continue to march into the future irrespective of whatever actions you take. In another 20 years from now would you like to arrive there having accomplished many of your goals or accomplishing nothing?
Always have an exit plan.
Not sure it’s really a quote, so maybe it doesn’t count … but it’s such common wisdom that it probably should count.
I never really appreciated it until I went through something where the wisdom of it would have made the difference. The slightly more precise version, IMO, is that whenever you’re in a position where something beyond your control can have a substantial influence on the outcome, you need an exit plan before you commit to that position, where that plan includes the definition of the conditions which trigger both the preparation of the execution of the plan and the time to actually exit.
The whole idea is to be prepared to not get fucked by other people or bad luck. And half of the benefit of having the plan is in the perspective it gives you. Instead of having Stockholm syndrome or suffering from the sunk cost fallacy, you naturally assess your situation as the set of trade offs that it is and more naturally perceive the toxic people that are essentially stuck in their worlds and either hold others back or propagate the culture that holds others back.
Make sure you have the plan, including the trigger conditions, formulated ahead of time, and regularly think back on the plan as you’re going along, adjusting or reassessing as necessary.
This is game-changingly good advice. I just wish it was easier to come up with exit plans. I have often found myself stuck in situations where there was no clear or realizable exit plan opportunity, which meant I wasted a lot of time being stuck in the Stockholm syndrome situation, and resenting it.
a hippy dippy one:
“whatever time it happened was the right time, whoever was there were the right people, whatever happened was the only thing that could have happened. It is always your time to do it, and same for everyone else.”
Building self esteem requires esteemable acts.
“You’re imagining everyone in this story way more attractive than they actually were.”
- some reddit guysometimes people will really fuckin hurt you and you won’t ever get an apology
“The more you tell the truth, the more your life becomes an adventure”.
My favorite psychology professor told me this, and it rings true. I’m autistic, and have an obsession with never saying anything inaccurate or untruthful, even if it’s a common way to phrase things.
I’ve also had a ridiculously interesting bunch of adventures in my life, and it just keeps getting more interesting.
I think that my unwillingness to bend the truth in order to fit in or smooth things over or ignore things, has led to a lot of those adventures happening.
We tend to use lies, as a culture, to stabilize our lives into predictable, known shapes. Once you stop that, it goes off the rails very quickly.
Same here! Life is so much easier if you just tell the truth. This is a great quote.
Misery is not a currency.
Meaning you cannot pay off grief, sadness, guilt, or remorse by forcing yourself to be miserable. It’s not a penance. Fell your feelings, and get on with life.
“Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.”
