In inpatient psychiatry I tell my coworkers “I hope your shift is mind-numbingly boring” or something similar (keyword being boring) because in my line of work, interesting (usually) = bad.
What’re yours?
“Don’t let the magic smoke out!”
In electrical/computer/embedded engineering, we have a running gag that microchips work by trapping magic smoke inside, and when you do something wrong, you “let out” the magic smoke.
While I was learning to solder I definitely let the magic smoke out a few times, and I can confirm that those boards no longer worked!
‘Let’s smoke test it’ is still a common phrase in electronics.
Different origin though. A smoke test is more like if you try running something and you see smoke then you haven’t fixed it yet
And that smoke is exactly the magic smoke the original comment was talking about…
Before covid lockdown I made my living as a street performer, doing magic shows for crowds of strangers. In that very niche community, “Fat hats!” is a common farewell or replacement for “good luck”. In this case “hat” refers to the donations in the hat rather than the actual hat.
“Shoot yourself in the head, asshole!”
That’s one I get a lot. The most positive one anyway.
parking inspector?
Law enforcement?
In the burlesque world, it’s “Pop a pastie!”
In the South they say “bless your heart,” which is kind of the opposite. It’s like calling someone a simpleton.
I really dislike that the internet took this and turned it into an insult. It was never meant to be hateful.
That’s not what my southern mother-in-law tells me.
I think there’s room for a little bit of nuance here
It’s pretty much always going to mean you’ve been a little dumb, or naive, etc. so it’s an insult in that sense.
But I tend to hear it used by southerners in sort of a “aw, they don’t know any better/can’t help it” sort of way.
So more like when I call my dog an idiot because she got her leash tangled around a street sign again. There’s no malice in it, she’s dumb, but she can’t help it, she’s just a dog.
Not like if I call my coworker an idiot because he’s continuing to fuck up the same basic shit no matter how or how many times you explain it to him, he should know better and can help it.
Now, there’s arguably another level of insult/disrespect implied because they are talking about you in the same way they would a dog or a small child. I don’t think that’s really something they usually intend, but of course the intention isn’t really as important as how the target actually feels about it. You can also probably get really psychological about it and dig into how their word choice reflects how they view others in relation to themselves or something, but I’m neither interested in nor qualified to go down that rabbit hole right now.
Disclaimer- those are just hypothetical examples I gave, both my dog and my coworkers are actually pretty pretty smart and capable. She’s actually the first dog I’ve ever had who actually seems to understand how to not get tangled on a street sign, so I mean no disrespect to her, or to my coworkers either I guess.
Well put bro.
I’d suggest it can be used even more lightly than that, to express that someone is pitiable in some way. My boss, who is from the Carolinas, was talking about her mother who had just had a stroke, and said “my momma, bless her heart”.
As you say, there are shades of meaning, and context is sorry important.
Oh, bless your heart
It’s always been an insult.
Instead of saying “bless you” when someone sneezes, I quite like the alternative: “shut the fuck up”.
Ever since middle school, my “bless you” interaction has always been:
- “Bless you.”
- Them: “Thank you.”
- “You’re welcome.”
And whenever I sneeze, it’s “bless me, thank me, I’m welcome.”
Thank you for attending my TEDtalk.
Wouldn’t it still be “thank you”? Funny one though!
No, I mean I say the entire thing to myself. “Bless me, thank me, I’m welcome.”
Middle school me started doing it and I’ve put in no effort to stop.
Ahh yeah I’m not sure what I was thinking earlier lol
If I sneeze and somebody says “bless you”, my response is “No, but thanks for the offer”.
“Merde”. As in, the french word for “shit” - or, should we say, “horseshit”. Why? Well because at the time of horse-drawn carriages, a successful play at the theatre would leave a lot of horseshit in front if the theatre from the many, many coaches awaiting their fares.
ah yes ! and it’s customary to not reply “thanks” to that
'Xactly. You say “je prends !” as in “I’m taking it!”
I didn’t know that one
I hope your new code compiles with only a few errors.
If it compiles with tons of errors, it’s gonna take a while to fix, but if it compiles with no errors, that probably means it’s so fucked the compiler can’t even help. Every once in a while I’ll code something error-free first try, and it always takes more time because I’m trying to figure out if it’s actually error-free.
I like lots of errors because it usually means I did one major thing wrong and everything else works once I fix it.
Write some god damn unit tests before you write your functionality
I’ll embrace test driven development when I’m 6 feet under.
Based.
This is a really good example of the specific vibe I was going for. A good next question would be: “what is a good thing in your niche industry or hobby that most outsiders would consider a bad thing?”
That’s what unit tests are for
“Fuck shit up, man.”
“Hope the night is manageable.” I work in a field where people aren’t sure how to wish me a good night at work.
Hope it’s quiet.
In Quebec French, instead of saying “Break a leg” you say “merde” which literally translates to “shit”
“You can do it, buddy. Shit your pants!”
I mean, I don’t actually know if people ever say this or not, but you can start if you wanna be a cool trendsetter!
I have had bowel obstructions before and if a nurse or doctor said this I would be very amused 🤣
Having had a defecography this is very similar to the encouragement the radiologist gave me…
“I hope you have the day you deserve.”
If that was true, we would not have shitty government
My version is “I hope your day is as pleasant as you are.” Said mock sweetly to asshole customers.
“Keep the shiny side up” is a nice thing to say to a motorcyclist.
Keep the rubber side down, also.
In the helicopter world is “keep the spinny bits up”
Keep it Swayze!
