Wrestle the pig first, every day. Whatever is your worst, most unpleasant, annoying task for the entire day, do it before you do anything else. It minimizes your stress and worrying and puts it in the rearview mirror.
For a second I thought you were talking about masturbation.
Well yeah crank your hog first of course
Slap the monkey
Filbert and Heffer playing “Spank the Monkey”
Oh bay bee, oh bay bee, oh bay bee.
Rocko?
Mrs. Bighead?
simultaneous phone slam
There was also that one that was cut from the camping episode.
Rocko is foraging for berries and he grabs one on a bush and the bush recoils and you hear a bear growl. Then a bear jumps out from behind the bush grabbing his crotch and running away in obvious pain.
Choke the chicken.
Flog the dolphin
Mildly to firmly squeeze your penis while moving your hand back and forward
SPEAK UP BROTHER, I CANT HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF MY CRANKED HOG
AROOOOOO
ABSOLUTELYCRANKINMYMF’INHOG
Ok, I wrestled a cop and pinned him. What’s step 2? Please respond before his backup arrives.
I think you’re supposed to tickle his balls now.
My former mentor said: 80% of the deliverable is the 20% of the scope you really don’t want to do
Alternatively, if you’re neurodivergent you may have a better time doing the easiest tasks first to build momentum and motivation.
Yeah, everyone’s neurochemistry is different and should be experimented with.
I didn’t know this for so long, that I needed a few easy wins to set the pace, that I feel like I could have been way more productive throughout my 20s haha
I feel like saying “I have to do this before anything else” might very well end with me doing nothing
I have some paperwork to do that will likely result in $2000. It’s been over a year and i cannot just sit down and do it. I stress over it every day but continue to put it off.
Today. Let’s both finish our paperwork today. The sense of freedom and achievement will be good.
Ok. I have a 2 hour car ride this afternoon. I will get everything ready this morning and do it in the car. Thanks! Good luck!
Excellent. I hope you did OK. I got mine done! It wasn’t as bad as I thought. If you haven’t finished yet, don’t give up, pick up the pieces and carry on. Thanks for being my Internet buddy on this.
Congratulations! I didn’t finish, but did get a good start on it. Thanks for the encouragement!
Well done. Starting is the hardest part. Are you going to do a bit more today?
I’m on vacation until Wednesday so I will finish it on my flight home. Getting started really was the hardest part. Now it’s just putting numbers into boxes and adding them up. By gathering info and starting on it, i find that the expected $2k gain is closer to $10k. That’s some great motivation to get it done!
Human memory is bias towards most recent things in a group set. If your set is a “workout” or a “workday”, doing the fun stuff last will affect positively all the memory items in the same group set. This works even if you know that your memory is doing this.
We don’t live in a “present now”. We live in a mental image constructed from memory of recent past.
Trick is not to do unpleasant stuff first, but to do pleasant stuff last.
I don’t think “waking up early” counts, but it’s definitely the most unpleasant and annoying task of my weekdays, followed closely by actually getting to work.
But where will I find a pig?
They’re easy to spot. They’re typically wearing cute little uniforms & driving fun little cars with lights on top.
Best advice ever.
How much better life is by simply not drinking alcohol.
Or soda. Or sugary drinks in general.
I hate the talk about soda. It’s a flavored carbonated drink and carbonation isn’t killing people. When schools banned sodas from vending machines, they replaced them with yoohoo and other drinks that had as much or more sugar than the carbonated drinks they removed. -stepping off my soapbox-
Fruit juice is notorious for this.
‘but its fruit juice! Its 100% natural!’
Most still have added sugars on top of the fact that most of the fruit has been squeezed out only leaving… Sugars.
Even on their own, the natural fruit sugars aren’t enough to make drinking fruit juice “healthy” when all the fiber has been squeezed out.
But the one two punch of sugars is just as bad as any other sugary drink.
Same with cans of Arizona or Snapple or anything else. It’s all terrible.
The problem isn’t carbonation (Bubly, Liquid Death have 0g). The problem is carbonated sugary drinks typically have more sugar than other sugary drinks, not a rule but per amount sold.
The typical soda has 38g of sugar per 12oz (can). Google states the following: Coca-Cola is 45g. Mountain Dew is 46g. Redbull and Monster are 34g. Arizona Sweet Tea is 31g. Apple juice is 33g. Orange juice is 28g. Cranberry juice is 42g.
Anything over 28g is no go territory for me. Anything under is generally not an issue blood sugar wise for me. Note: I am not diabetic.
People don’t realize that ultra processed food is basically everything they eat and drink. There are very few things that aren’t, and they’re mostly whole food adjacent.
If it’s not straight up water and plain vegetables, fruit, and grain equivalents, it’s more than likely ultra processed no matter how healthy it claims to be.
So much of non-genetic cancers comes from what we ingest willingly. A large portion of it would stop if everyone ate a well rounded whole foods diet. But shit is expensive, takes time and kwh to make, and people are busy trying to enjoy life.
Conventional Cereal? Terrible. https://www.livestrong.com/article/13774827-is-eating-cereal-every-day-bad/
Certain processed fiber gives you liver cancer Ffs lol.
I try not to drink calories at all, but if I do, it’s considered part of the meal.
I strongly recommend this, as strongly as reading the news everyday. Don’t watch or listen to it, READ it. It makes you conscious of your participation, makes it easier to remember, and over time, will sharpen your critical thinking skills
If you’ve ever thought ‘holy fuck some people are dumb’, well, if they read the news on the reg, they’d be less and less dumb, everyday.
I’m going on holiday to Greece next month, so have decided to forgo my usual weekend ales until then. Partly to be a little more comfortable in my swimming shorts, but also because £10/15 a weekend adds up to a few cold pints of Mythos by the beach.
But I was amazed at how fresh I felt last Monday morning after not having drunk any beer over the weekend.
I feel like there’s a subtlety here. Ocassional Glass of wine with dinner versus binge drinking.
Of course the problem is that the first drink makes then next one more attractive and degrades impulse control… so YMMV.
One is too many and a thousand is never enough.
Edit: I do get the irony of someone with my username posting this. I understand what’s wrong with binge drinking and me in general, I’m just not ready to fix it.
You and I are in the same place.
Well, I’m not in Texas, but I’m with you otherwise.
I’ll fix it sometime. Hopefully soon.
We’re gonna be alright, buddy.
Thank ya. We definitely are. My problem is, drinkin’ makes everything SO MUCH FUN. If it just wasn’t so damn fun, it wouldn’t be an issue
Wow. This thread got pretty real, pretty quick. I feel you though (you too, Texas).
You’re gonna be alright, too.
Having a glass of wine every day is not healthy.
Trying new wines is a good experience, not much of a drinker, but a good wine or cider is great for relaxing and overall experience
Depends on the person. I’m content only have 1 at a time. I don’t have an addictive personality though. For some people this is great advice. Others, it doesn’t affect.
Yep. For me it made the week so much easier…wake up fresher, work out easier, handle job tasks smoother.
Friday night have fun. Wednesday? Nah. Tea please.
Just how much cheaper and longer lasting keeping thing like rice, dried beans and flour can be. It’s amazing to me that no matter how empty my cupboards/fridge is I can always make fresh tortillas, refried beans, and rice in like an hour.
My wife’s Italian. Replace your items with always having a bottle of sauce and a packet of pasta in the cupboard, and there’s always a meal to be had no matter how empty the fridge is.
Amen to that. But I can’t do jar/bottled sauce so if I want easy noodles, it’s cook noodles, leave some pasta water after draining, throw in some butter at the end to make it thicc, then serve topped with olive oil/red pepper flakes/salt/pepper/parmigiano Reggiano (all things I make sure I always have in stock always)
I also keep a stack of cans of San Marzano tomatoes to make a red sauce any time I want, but that takes a couple hours instead of 20 minutes.
There are good sauces you can make from canned tomatoes in 20 minutes (depending on your prep speed).
My go tos are Putanesca & Vodka sauce, but there’s a lot more you can do. Mark Bittman’s How to Cook Everything has a simple recipe and then a big list of variants, most of which can be done in 20 minutes.
Noted, thank you! I have a specific sauce I like to make, and I like it best simmered for a couple hours in a Dutch oven hahaha
Yes. And you can get all kinds of crap canned. The only thing I’ve found you can’t really replace is crunchy greens.
I’m not surprised people don’t know after decades of cold supply chain, but it’s a thing.
If you need to remember something for the next time you go out, put your shoes somewhere odd. When you go to leave, you’ll remember you moved them, which will remind you why you moved them.
Or you won’t be able to find your shoes, panic because you’re running late, and forget about the thing you needed because of said panic.
That’s why you always leave a note.
Oh my god, that guys arm came off!
If the note is with your shoes, doors that make it a footnote?
Bah! Go to the Agony Booth,2 min!
I’ll usually put a reminder or most often the thing itself in the shoes.
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I do this with my phone on my nightstand. If I need to remember something I put it out of reach
If I need to remember to bring something with me when I go out I’ll put my keys on top of it.
Buying lots of identical pairs of socks massively reduces the amount of time you need to find matching pairs after drying them.
I scrape CVV number of my credit card and save it on my smartphone because if I lost my credit card nobody will be able to shop on line
Drink water instead of soda, alcohol, other sugary drinks. Eventually you’ll find yourself to be an expert water connoisseur and prefer water over pretty much all beverages.
I love water so much I always add a splash to my whisky!
in the uk old timers would order “whiskey and threat” - like just threaten it with water
Or Tea with little/no sweetening (my personal favorite is hibiscus with a little lemon in there).
Sometimes I indulge in tea with a bit of honey for the occasional caffeine fix.
Sometimes I indulge in a coke but I usually prefer tap water now.
Same. Often finish the can with a feeling of disappointment and thirst.
Not like that for me. But there is a certain lack of satisfaction if I had to define it.
Almost all bottled water is loaded with microplastics. Ideally, drink water from a filtered tap.
It’s okay, there storednin my balls for later
Along with all of my pee
I have a water filter at home. I never use bottled water. Almost every public space also has clean and safe water so if you bring a reusable water bottle with you, you’ll have free water everywhere.
Filters are usually made out of plastic :)
There’s a difference between high quality plastic performing filtration while it’s cold plastic and cold water vs crap plastic that’s regularly exposed to high temperatures during transport and storage with the same water contained the entire time.
Maybe, I’m no expert. But, I’ve seen a test showing a consumer water filter increasing microplastics by 1000%. Could just be only that specific filter or filter type. I believe it was a Zero filter, which I think uses resin beads for ion exchange.
Interesting, I used ZeroWater for a while … and know others that do. But yeah, searching around it seems it’s only ConsumerLabs.com that came up with that result and all other filters were removing (at least some percentage of) microplastics.
I’m not sure how much I trust that ConsumerLabs.com test: https://www.consumerlab.com/methods/water-filters-review/water-filters/
Repeatability isn’t really established by testing one device, one time. I’m not an expert either, but that result seems quite surprising.
I have a reverse osmosis system now personally…
Nah, I’m all about the kombucha now.
Edit: fuck, y’all really hate probiotics
You can just pinch the end of a banana to start peeling it. The effort required is far less than trying to overcome the ripping force of the stem.
My partner hates when I open bananas like this because there’s a little dark part of the banana under that end of the peel that she calls “The Ban-anus” and thinks it’s gross even if I pick off that part and don’t eat it.
I don’t get the banana trick. What do I do after pinching? I just end up ripping through the skin of one while trying it out.
Monkeys peel bananas also like this.
Exactly. The professionals showed us the way.
Bananas are the way they are through millenia of selective breeding, so there’s no reason to think that monkeys know anything we don’t. If pinching the bottom is easier than bending the stem, your banana isn’t ripe yet and doesn’t want to be eaten until later.
A) that seems backwards: an under ripe banana will be stiff inside so you can snap the peel around the stem when you bend it, while a riper, softer banana will mush inside when you bend the stem. And,
B) like I give a fuck what a banana wants
A) The peel becomes easier to tear faster than the inside gets softer. You don’t need to snap it, it doesn’t need nearly enough tension to count as a snap once it’s ripe.
B) The banana’s been selectively bred to want to be as delicious as possible. It only wants you to be happy.
I’d like to apologize for my remarks regarding banana
Have you ever tried opening a banana from the bottom like described in the comment?
Yes. Every time, it’s gone less well than opening a banana from the stem end, unless the banana was horrendously underripe. I’ve never had the problem the alternative approach is claiming to fix unless I’ve intentionally opened the banana badly on purpose to prove a point about the problem really being people opening from the stem end incompetently.
While I can concede your point that it’s feasible and possibly even more practical to open from the stem, I gotta say that since switching to the other end years ago(because I saw a similar thread on reddit), it’s been super easy and I’ve had zero issues. The stem just has a higher rate of fucking up, but it’s not like either end will fully decimate the banana. Peeling properly after it’s opened is an easy fix either way.
I love how it skillfully peels the banana and then eats the peel anyway. Amazing.
But not the stem!
Fuck you, I’ll keep peeling the banana stem-first!
That’s way too slow.
Take one end in each hand, hold it “like a frown” in front of you.
Bend it in half downward and bite the peak of the bend with one of your canines.
when it snaps open, shove one half of the banana into your mouth, (chew if needed, then) swallow.
Shovel the other half into your mount, (chew if needed, then) swallow.I was today-years-old when I learned the ideal way to eat a banana.
And that’s only the oral method.
This also prevents those weird banana strings from forming!
And then you have a handle to hold it by when you get to the end (beginning?)!
I just use my fingernail to make a small cut at the stem end and then it’s super easy to peel that back
People peel from the stem? What?!
Why even peel at all? https://youtu.be/L1QVp55ehvs?si=W1vfyguSovNK7SmG
Just reposting without the tracker: https://youtu.be/L1QVp55ehvs
Learn to cook the base of meals in different cultures. Like a Sofrito.
Most of the best classic dishes in the world really start with three or four ingredients and are just variations. You shouldn’t overthink it or buy rare ingredients. You’re better off picking one and mastering the basic steps. Learning to cook isn’t about learning to recreate a chef-cooked meal. It’s about learning to cook simple, cheap ingredients.
Hey that’s a quality life changing hack right here. Food is the most important thing with sleep.
Would you have a list of those base meals maybe ?
@dephyre mentionned refried beans with rice in the thread. @DeltaTangoLima responded with bottled (canned) pasta sauce. I’d say learn how to make ratatouille and store (can) some when you can get the ingredient (green bell pepper, zucchinis, eggplan, tomatoes) at the right time of the year.
It’s usually just to take a small amount of delicious oil or fat — whatever you have on hand — and saute diced onions with diced bell pepper (or local equivalent) until the onions are slightly transparent. Keep going if you want the onions start being brown and have a sweet flavor. That brown is just the natural sugars coming out of the onion and is what “caramelizes means.” Caramel is sugar. And then add garlic and/or ginger and whatever spices you like.
If you want to add meat. If you don’t do not. (Often, that very oil step is done from browning meat and not wasting the fat.)
If you want soup, add a lot of liquid and whatever and cook it slowly. If you want paella, jambalaya, equivalent — every culture has a rice dish — use the rice recipe on the bag as if it were water. (Use stock if you have any but water works fine.)
There are dishes that are different. Like fried rice and French Toast use old rice and toast respectively. Baking is a science. But anyone can make a pot of delicious with a few ingredients and it’s a 10 minute, one pot meal.
This is the way.
You start frying an onion and then figure out what you’re making for dinner.
Is it even a life hack, or an essential life skill. Most us didn’t formally learned, but have seen/helped our parents from an early age and one day, we ended up in a student room meaning it was time to cook
When the pandemic happened, there were people who didn’t know how to make the easiest meals. I was shocked. So, my rule on recipes is that nothing is too basic.
I just found a japanese comfort food staple: Ochazuke - green tea rice. It just needs a couple of ingredients and is super quick. I was blown away by how good and comforting it was. Its Comfort in a quick bowl. And it’s super adaptable. You can basically add anything as tipping.
This is the blogpost that inspired me https://rasamalaysia.com/green-tea-rice/
I really like this. Do you have any resources I can check out that cover this?
I started watching Babish & Weissman’s channels on YouTube during the pandemic. Both of them put out easy to follow videos, but they also include links to recipes in the video description, so you don’t have to write it all down.
The Basics with Babish videos are great because they show multiple dishes with a given protein.
I watch them both a ton, good stuff. Weissman can be a little snooty tho. K Keni Lopez-Alt is amazing 😍
Not really a “hack” but I don’t know why most people get into phone contracts.
Since college, I have always just bought unlocked phones with cash and then used the carrier’s prepaid plans and set it to auto pay.
I pay so much less than most people I know, I get all the same service, and my phone isn’t tied to a contract or carrier, so I can cancel my plan whenever I want and switch to another carrier by just buying their SIM card for ~$20.
My current phone is an unlocked Pixel 6a that I got on sale new for $300. I have unlimited talk, text, and data for $45 a month. And if I get sick of my current carrier or they bump my cost, I can just switch to anybody else for just the cost of a $20 SIM card.
I have so many friends and family members that complain about their phone bills being super high and their service sucking, but they can’t cancel their contracts without paying off their huge balances plus the interest and usually cancelation fees. Plus, because their phone is tied to the contract/carrier, they can’t even keep transfer the phone to the new carrier and have to get sucked into a “phone trade-in” deal and the cycle continues.
And for the folks saying that most people can’t afford to save up and buy a phone outright, there are a lot of places that offer payment plans for the phone, or you can buy it on credit and pay it off that way, which would likely be less interest over time. Or you could buy unlocked used/refurbished phones for 25-50% off their normal price.
Maybe it makes sense if you get a stipend from your company, or you bundle it with a bunch of other packages like cable TV or internet, but for just a cell phone, I just don’t get locking yourself into a crazy contract.
This seems like an American problem. This used to be the case in the Netherlands as well but over the years people have learned that SIM-only subscriptions are so much easier and cheaper that the majority of people now use SIM-only. In fact I know of no one around me that does it differently.
Also $45 per month is still expensive lol. I pay €12 a month. Sure, not unlimited but I never call or SMS so the 100 a month I get for that is way more than enough and I never finish the 10GB of data a month either. I can make either unlimited for really not that much more.
France is a bit similar, but a new phone company decided to cut down the costs by not providing a phone. 20 € a month formore data than you’ll ever need or 50 € a month with the latest iPhone included everyone chooses the first option
I believe a major factor in this was a ruling by the Hoge Raad that a “free” phone with a contract is unlawful and is actually a loan. Carriers now have to list the price for the phone and for the service separately, so it’s a lot more clear what the costs of the phone are.
Also, a “free” phone is now registered as a loan with monthly recurring costs, which impacts for example the maximum mortgage you can get on a home.
Nice, over here $45 a month is pretty cheap, at least in my circles. Most people I know are paying close to double that.
Bonus points in that android phones won’t have their bootloader encrypted by a cellular service provider.
Absolutely right!
Part of the problem is that we’re advertised at constantly, so when the latest, greatest iPhone or Galaxy or Pixel comes along we feel like we need it. Because if we get the £1200 phone the resell value in two years will still be high, right? It actually makes sense.
But the only way to afford that is to borrow the money to pay for it.
I picked up an iPhone 13 mini last year, on a two year contract, for £29 a month. And that’s ok by me. By the end of my contract I’ll go SIM-only and my bill will drop to around £10 a month, which I’ll rock until Apple finally release another mini phone.
So this 13 mini will be the last phone I ever use…
I agree except who is charging you $20 for a sim?
Verizon, might have been a little less, but reasonable to me, I keep my phones for a long time, and I got a really good deal on it.
Because people want the latest iPhone or Samsung and paying $ per month works better for them than $$$ upfront. The alternate finance method you speak of isn’t very well known, so it’s most simple to contract with a carrier.
I don’t know if I’m grandfathered in or what but I have Google Fi (I know I know I suck) and have 3 lines unlimited everything for $80/month
Solid.
Google Fi is a god-tier service for traveling abroad. When I went to South America I paid nothing extra vs my friends who had to deal with Verizon’s ridiculous travel plan fees.
But who actually does this otherwise? I have seen those kind of contracts advertised, but I never see people actually having them, apart from some 16yo who want the new iPhone by all means and this is the only way they can finance it.
If you go prepaid for a year you can get service for even cheaper. I don’t need unlimited data so I buy a year of Mint Mobile’s cheapest plan for about 200 dollars which gives unlimited talk and text and 5gb data for only around 15 dollars a month.
Start reading the nutritional facts on food packages. In the beginning it will make little sense. But as time goes by, you start understanding it a bit more and to notice patterns.
Eventually you start doing wiser choices. I’ve learned pretty quickly that the “healthy options” (e.g. low sugar cookies) are as bad for you than the regular ones.
To stop infinite scroll on social media, quickly scroll 2-3 screen lengths down without looking at the posts. Now read the posts scrolling up. Eventually you’ll reach where you started and most probably the laziness to go all the way back will prompt you to exit the app.
Put $20-50 behind your phone in the phone case.
If you ever forget / lose your wallet, you’ll have a little cash.
One time I was in Mexico with my wife while our daughter was still a baby and the lady at the front desk of the hotel where we were staying offered us a crib we could borrow. It was a kind gesture, but I was a little concerned because the crib seemed wobbly. I realized there were some screws loose but though I had a multitool on me, the holes were stripped.
So later, I was talking with a local and he’s like “I can fix that.” He comes over and pulls a pack of toothpicks out of his pocket. He sticks one into each hole and breaks it off so that it’s not sticking out anymore. Then he drives the screw back in. I shook the crib after that and it was rock solid!
Now I always keep some toothpicks handy. Fast-forward to just this year. My daughter is now an adult living in a condo, and was complaining the screw popped out of a kitchen cabinet door when her roommate yanked on it too hard. “I can fix that.”
Wood glue and/or toothpicks are probably stronger than the particle board most furniture is made of nowadays, it’s repairing and strengthening.
Another adjacent life hack is when assembling flat pack furniture, use a quality wood glue on all the joints and connectors, but especially those little wood dowels. It won’t make it indestructible, but it’ll hold up far better over time.
You can do something similar with damaged metal threads, instead of toothpicks using copper wire strands. Project Farm has a video on the technique comparing it to other fixes: https://youtube.com/watch?v=jknMrFOGMOQ
It works a bit better if you put a little bit of wood glue on the tip of each toothpick before driving it into the hole. Definitely a great trick!
I still don’t understand how this works. Maybe a video or image would help. How would he drive the screw in to the toothpicks if it was stripped?
Well the toothpick shifts to one side as you put the screw in.
The problem with a stripped hole is that the hole is now as wide as the screw, so the screw has nothing to grip anymore. Conventional wisdom in this case is that you should get a wider screw and try again, but that’s not always something you have on hand, especially when travelling.
But the toothpick hack takes it the other way. It’s effectively narrowing the hole again by taking up space in it, and now your same screw can work again.
The hole is stripped not the screw head. The toothpicks give the screw something to grip.
Ohh ok that makes much more sense
I’m so glad you posted this - my integrated fridge door has dropped slightly after being taken off and put back on when installed. Can’t really screw back into mdf/chipboard/whatever and I’ve been stressing about getting it fixed for months because whilst it’ll get worse over time, it technically works and no doubt the fitter would say I need to take the whole thing out and replace the side panel.
Thank you!
Sometimes fridge doors sag because the bushings on the hinges break or deteriorate. I’ve fixed them before by adding washers in place of the bushings, or cutting a new bushing out of a hard plastic cutting board.
Using a rubber band around the lid of a jar to open it effortlessly.
